The mainstream media has broadcast programs that criticize or mock the politicians who have an affair. Bill Clinton is the victim of the main stream ideology. After he had an affair with Monica, not only him but also his mistress was bombed with a bunch of criticisms all day long. In the end, Bill Clinton apologized for his misbehavior in front of the whole country.( Lauren Berlant, 66) However, according to the Polyamory subculture supporters, they deemed Bill Clinton’s affair sole as his personal business. They claimed that It is not morally wrong for him if he likes his mistress and he can have the cake and eat it, which means that as long as he is the good husband for Hilary Clinton and the good father for her children, he has the right to enjoy an affair with another girl he is in love with. However, this subculture that I belong to is different from the mainstream culture for relationship. The majority of my Chinese friends support the mainstream culture for relationship, they keep telling me, “It is only morally correct if a person starts a relationship with another one but he or she can never flirt or cheat on his or her partners.” Once I have a friend who was found cheating, the other immediately badmouth and insult him, by saying “You are a jerk” or “You are the trash on earth”. I believe this is only an old-school and silly doctrines that prevent people from living that life that want. In fact, only less than 10 percent of the people in the United States are practicing this subculture. I admit that I think differently in this matter but that does not mean that I do not value loyal in a relationship. Here, I would like to unravel my opinion in detail about why I support this subculture although it is deemed to be “immoral”. We see these cases about celebrities cheating on their partners happening all the time and what the majority and the mainstream media do is judging. The way I see it, probably the reason why people judge them is not because they are nobler or have greater morality, but because they want to do the same but have no guts or dare not. Or we are all hypocrites in some way. The sexual subcultures liberate people’s desire and the supporters of the sexual subcultures do not let the conventional value obstruct themselves having fun. They mock the moral and loyal people as “hypocrites”. The truth is, as I see it, love is something which cannot be measured by a single aspect alone such as loyalty or honesty or consideration or how much you devote to it. Some people claim that loyalty and responsibility are the most important aspect in one’s marriage or relationship, that’s why when his or her spouse cheats, that’s the end of world for them. Plus, their spouse then becomes the worst and most egregious person in the whole world. However, as a supporter of Polyamory, I have to argue that who says and decides which moral principle is the most “important”? For me, I believe consideration and the affection is the essential, how happy you make one another feel and how fast your hearts beat together. Sexual subculture celebrates free love and we believe that only be getting rid of the chains that mainstream culture and ideology put on us, can we only taste that simplest joy of being a human. Also, there is the third Sexuality and gender identity-based subculture is called the sexual fetish-based cultures. According to the sexual fetish-based cultures, it allows people who have sexual fetishes or other paraphilias to enjoy their lives. The fetish subculture encourages people to enjoy themselves in a strong nightclub scene. These paraphilia is about any sexual behavior that the general public deems as abnormal. For example, it is often thought to be abnormal if an old man gets married with a girl half on his age. Whenever this happens, the old man and the young girl would be seriously criticized for their “sick love” by the media. I believe it is unfair for the majority to lash out while their relationship has nothing to do with them. From time to time, the public will think of their love as a sick affection. Sometimes, they call the young girl as an “expensive prostitute” and sometimes they mock at the old man as a sick man who is not able to perform sexually. The sexual subculture group I belong to is different from the one that mainstream ideology set on us. For us, we do not care about the chains that conventional thoughts put on us as long as we are happy. I believe that it is important for the sexual subculture to influence more people because this is the true value for human beings to liberate from all these restrictions and finally be able to live the most out of it.
Reference:
Hephaestus Books, 2017, Articles on Sexuality and Gender Identity-Based Cultures, Including: Bdsm, Swinging, Hijra (South Asia), Modern Primitive, Separatist Feminism, Hephaestus Books
Lauren Berlant, 2017, Our Monica, Ourselves: The Clinton Affair and the National Interest, NYU Press Sandra L. Faiman-Silva, 2017, The Courage to Connect: Sexuality, Citizenship, and Community in Provincetown, University of Illinois Press Donald Vining, 1993, A Gay Diary: 1975-1982, Pepys Press Kelly Boyer Sagert, 2017, Flappers: A Guide to an American Subculture, ABC-CLIO
Micah Issitt, 2017, Hippies: A Guide to an American Subculture: A Guide to an American Subculture, ABC-CLIO
Randall Herbert Balmer, 2017, Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory: A Journey Into the Evangelical Subculture in America, Oxford University Press
One: the conversation I have with a gay friend: |
