As saying goes “The eyes are the window of the soul”. That is to say, we can read one’s mind through his/her eyes. Eye language can express complicated feelings and it is an important way to judge the intimacy of communicators. People from English speaking countries have more eye contact when they are in conversation. According to American tradition, communicators must gaze at each other. “But there are many rules about eye language: Whether to look at the other communicator or not; when it is the time to look at them, how long we can look at; who we can look at and who we can’t; they all imply different meanings in communication.”p94 In Juliets Faster’s book “Body Language”, there is a paragraph which can explain the problem. “Two strangers sit face to face in the dinning room in a train; they can introduce themselves to each other. When they are eating, they can talk anything else. They also can avoid eye contact and do not show interest in each other. A writer described this situation in an article “They look over the menu again and again, play with knives and look at their nails. It seems that they look at them for the first time. If their eyes meet, they will turn away immediately and look out of the window.” (4) Americans pay great attention to the time and the way of eye contact. In common conversation, they will look at each other about one minute and then they will look away. If two Americans gaze at each other, which indicate they are intimate. In North America, the children there have learned to look at the other communicator directly. If they don’t, they are regarded lack of enthusiasm or confidence. They believe the saying “Never trust a person who can’t look you in the eyes.”p36 (5) If two Arabians are in conversation, they will look at each other warmly. Because they think eyes are the key of their existence. But in American eyes, they think this behavior is unsuitable or a homosexual behavior. The educated Englishmen believe direct eye contact with our communicators is gentlemanly. But Swedenians use eye language more often than Englishmen. And the French especially like to look attentively at the other communicators with admiration. Japanese often look at the other communicator’s neck when they are in conversation. They believe eye contact is impolite. And Chinese consider gazing people is an unfriendly behavior and it is a challenge. Some South American Indians used to look at different directions when they are talking. In the Middle East, it is considered extremely provocative for a woman to let a man catch her eyes, let alone, return his gaze. (6) Another example, Americans have a trip to a village and the local people stare at them. They are annoyed and think the local people are rude. In fact, it is normal in the village. They are just curious. “American social psychologist Michael Argyle found out: People who like each other have more eye-contact than people who dislike each other.”同p35 In communication, looking down frequently can indicate submissiveness or embarrassment. Looking away constantly may express dissatisfaction. Females are likely to communicate with more eye contact, especially among females. But too long eye contact will cause embarrassment. Most people feel uneasy and uncomfortable under the strong staring. When people always stare at us, we will feel we are threatened or suspect their sincerity. From what is mentioned above we can conclude that different cultural background has a great influence on body language. And eye language also reflects different cultures and believes. So we need to observe and compare and contrast carefully so as to improve cultural exchange and to blend well. 4.2 Gestures “Gesture means we communicate and express by the movement and manners of our hands and fingers.”p123 “Without gestures, our world will be static and colorless. We may literally roll up our sleeves when talking about cleaning up the room and run to meet the person we are eager to see. It seems natural to clench our fist or perhaps even pound to the lectern to let every one realize the importance of our message when trying to communicate a strong feeling, which emphasize our words.”[10]p64 In our daily life, every one makes gestures, but many gestures have distinct regional and cultural features. “Don’t assume that every one in the world understands one gesture in the same way.”[11]p44 For example， |
